The proverbial bible verse “Love is Patient, Love is Kind. It Does Not Envy, It Does Not Boast” is often expounded from the officiant during the wedding processional.  Although these words were repeated time after time, those words more often than not had an empty meaning and would leave an ephemeral impression towards me.

I would like to think I knew what love meant. I grew up with my head straight on my shoulders, built great relationships, and even gave back to the community with local services. But why was it that every time these simple words were uttered by the officiant, I would shrink away and was left with a mundane expression?

Maybe it was because those words were so overly used by Pastors that it became hackneyed or maybe it was simply because I didn’t know what Love really meant. Granted my parents did a wonderful job of raising me with their unconditional love, I couldn’t fully grasp what their actions meant. Providing for our family and telling they loved us was what they were supposed to do. It never occurred to me that Love really did take effort and hard work.

It wasn’t until I met my fiancée, that I truly felt those repeated words hit home. Naturally, it’s in our human nature to prioritize “ourselves” first, then others later. So often, even if we were to help others, subconsciously we rationalize to see if it’ll somehow benefit us thereafter. It becomes an agape love only when we assist and serve each other knowing we won’t receive anything in return. After meeting my then -girlfriend (even after the “honeymoon” phase), I gave every ounce of me to submit to her. It wasn’t that I was a weak and submissive person without a backbone, but simply it was because I understood what love meant.

Love really was patient, love really was kind and it definitely did not envy nor did it boast.  The concept of Love was coming together, albeit a little late. Now that I’m looking forward to my upcoming wedding, I would request our Pastor to utilize this verse to officiate us as well.

To those that are getting married soon, I’m sure I don’t have to badger on and on about how you should treat your significant other, but I exhort you to heed English novelist John Oxenham‘s counsel: “Love ever gives. Forgives, outlives. And ever stands with open hands. And while it lives, it gives. For this is love’s prerogatives – to give, and give, and give.” Also, what does love mean to you? Cheers.