Wedding Gift Etiquette: Accepting, Returning and Exchanging


By: Crystal and Jason Melendez

Most of this gift etiquette stuff is just common sense and being considerate, but it doesn’t hurt to take a look at some of the following reminders. In all the excitement and fuss, you don’t want to drop the ball anywhere.

To Bring or to Ship

Many guests will find it convenient to ship your wedding gifts directly, but
some will bring them to the reception. Make sure you have a table set up for this purpose in a safe yet out of the way area. Assign someone to accept gifts from guests as they arrive and make sure this helping soul has a roll of scotch tape to secure the accompanying card to each gift right away. One of the biggest gift problems newlyweds face is trying to match gifts up with a jumble of loose, non-attached cards and wind up with potentially many gifts whose senders are unknown. You’ll also need to arrange someone to help transport your wedding gifts home after the reception.

Money Gifts

If you’d like gifts of monetary joy, spread the word through friends, family, and possibly an online cash contribution registry option. Definitely do not put your request for green on your invitation, as it looks almost like you’re charging admission for attending your wedding. Not cool. Guests will either send your cash in the mail or bring it to your reception, along with a card. You could have a card box to receive such gifts at the reception. Record monetary gifts in your records just as you would any other.

Broken or Damaged Gifts

It’s bound to happen: a gift arrives, you open the package, and…Oops! It’s damaged. Luckily, items from your registry should be no problem to replace. Notify the store’s customer service right away, and you’ll be able to swap your
damaged goods with a pristine item.

If the gift is not from your registry, check to see if there’s a postal insurance stamp on the package. If so, you’re in luck: return the gift to the sender with a thank-you card and explanation so they can get reimbursed by the post office and send you a new gift. If the package was not insured, it’s best to bite the bullet and chalk the gift up as a casualty of shipping. Send a normal, gracious thank-you card to the sender and don’t mention the damage, or they’ll probably feel obligated to purchase another gift for you.

Duplicates

Some gifts are good to have duplicates of: sheets, place settings, towels, breakable items, and anything else that can wear out easily. Stash them away to replace used items later. For those gifts you definitely don’t want more than one of, though, you’ll want to exchange. Three toasters or two identical blenders are probably not going to be needed.

Most registries will be very open about exchanges, but do it soon after you receive the gift. Send your thank-you card to each sender of the duplicate item as if you were keeping theirs. No need to mention the exchange. And don’t ever ask a guest where they bought your gift so you can exchange it.

Unwanted Gifts

Sometimes you receive something that’s just not your style. You should feel free to return it to the store it was purchased from and trade it for something you do want, if the store information is provided. It’s your call whether or not to keep the original gift instead, to avoid potential hurt feelings if the sender comes by for a visit. Either way, send a gushing thank-you letter just as you would if the item was more up your alley, and don’t mention the exchange if you
do choose to make one.
Absent Gifts

Perhaps you haven’t received a wedding gift from a close friend or family member and fear it may have been lost in the mail. Resist the urge to ask about it. If the guest did send a gift and hasn’t heard from you about it or received a thank-you card, they’ll eventually bring it up.

Unnamed Gifts

At best you may have one or two gifts that either don’t have cards or have cards that are loose and unattached. At worst, you may wind up with many such anonymous packages. Try contacting the store and see if you can glean any information that way. Purchase date, store location, and anything else they can tell you may help narrow down the puzzle. Beyond that, it’s just good old process of elimination. Find out who you have on your guest list that you’re missing a gift from and see if you can enlist friends or family to help find out discreetly who sent what. Don’t ask guests yourself.

Gifts for a Postponed/Cancelled Wedding

If your wedding is put on hold, you’ll obviously be sending out announcements to your guests, and you can go ahead and hang on to the gift. If your wedding is cancelled, though, all gifts—shower, engagement, and wedding—need to be returned to the sender.

————————————-
ABOUT THE AUTHORS:
Crystal and Jason Melendez are the authors of e-Plan Your Wedding:
How to Save Time and Money with Today’s Best Online Resources
.
For more information, please visit http://www.eplanyourwedding.com